No one is safe. Well, actually all are but five and you know who you are.

OK. There’s really no danger here. No threats, you can all go about your business. Unless your names are Charles Osgood, Matt Lauer, George Stephanopoulos, Jon Stewart (again!), or Joe Scarborough. Yes, that’s right. I’ve expanded my scope and my sights are set on all of you.

3672431944_d66a49917e George, think how good it would be for your career!

I have to believe with the quality of the subject of my book Arn? Narn., at least one of you will see the incredible merit in featuring this book on one of your shows. If not, then the only conclusion that can be drawn is one of collusion. And we know what the government thinks about that.

So, here’s your opportunity. For those of you who have been hiding in a Afghan cave somewhere or just haven’t been reading my book, (George, Charles, Jon, Joe, and Matt,) here’s your chance to get a first hand exclusive. We know you all want ratings and now you can scoop the other, but be quick about it. However, in all fairness, I would give each of you this opportunity.  But only one can be first. Hell, you all have had Joe Biden almost simultaneously on your show. What gives?

8407419409_b376faf9aa Really?

In the next day or so to prove to you I’m serious, I’ll be sending all of you a press kit and a signed copy of my book. Please find an honored place for it on your book shelves, but not before reading it and then calling me.

For the morning shows, it would be a good placement before the cooking segments and before Kathie and Hoda start drinking. For Joe, pretty much anytime, but maybe Mike Barnicle would be good. Sunday, I’m open. I just don’t want to put too much pressure on you.

The ball’s in your court now.

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